AgonySam - Solving Lifes Big Issues

As you know I've been adding some new segments to the blog that will become weekly features. I cannot believe what a success my previous post #FMOTW was. I am totally overwhelmed by it! Here is another new segment, it's my AgonySam column in which I answer your questions and try to help you out with issues life throws your way! You can get involved by either dropping me a Tweet @SamSquireBlog, or, you can send me an email with your questions samsquireblog@gmail.com. All information is kept anonymous, I will not share your name with any story!

I want a promotion in my new job, how do I ask for this? – Anon­

Hold your horses tiger, you ‘want’ a promotion but do you deserve one? Let’s not become power crazy.  At the end of the day, progression in the workplace should be natural not forced. You say it’s a new job, you need to prove to your boss that you’re worthy of it over the people that have been there longer than you. What do you bring to the table that no one else does and why is this progression quite so important to you? Work out your priorities, more power means more responsibility and can mean more stress, do you want the added stress or are you okay going along as you are? One thing I would say for your situation is that you definitely should not even consider asking your boss for a promotion, unless by promotion you mean new job.

I’m falling in love with my best male friend, what do I do? - Anon

Before you consider doing anything, you need to think this through.  First off, the most important question is are you really in love with him or do you just think he’s a bit of alright? Second, how will this news affect your friendship, you don’t want to be going somewhere that is simply going to make things awkward! Finally, does he feel the same? I don’t just mean is he a flirt or has he called you pretty, I am talking emotion. Love sure is a confusing thing and at the end of the day, is it worth risking a friendship if you aren’t sure what to do? This is something you personally have to work out and answer; it isn’t something I can give you a definitive answer for because it is so personal to you. Good luck!

I have low self esteem, how do I become confident and happy in myself? - Anon

Personally I don’t understand why anyone should have low self esteem; we are all great in different ways.  You should never feel like someone is better than you, of course you can see their strong points but we all have our kryptonite, some are just better at hiding it than others! The main one I hate is the image one, don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re ugly, because in fact, they are the ugly ones.  You will simply get nowhere in life with an ugly personality, putting people down isn’t great and only inflates their egos for a few minutes before they remember that their life isn’t all that perfect!

I’m ready to move out from my parents’ house but I don’t want to do it alone, what should I do? - Anon

This is big! First of congratulations, it’s great you can admit to being ready, and to be quite honest with you, if you feel ready then I highly doubt you need a friend to hold your hand along the way!  It is a massive jump to make, suddenly you have to do it all for yourself and experience life, but that’s awesome, there is so much great stuff out there for you to see and experience so don’t let it go to waste! If you really don’t feel like you’re strong enough to take the leap on your own, I am sure you have friends in the same situation, why not mention it? I am sure someone will notice your predicament and will feel the same. Good luck in your move!

I want to go to university this year but I’m scared of not knowing anyone, do you have any tips? – Anon

I didn’t personally want the university experience – don’t get me wrong, I love a party but after a turbulent time in Sixth Form I felt I’d had enough of institutional learning. However, I know this much, everyone is in the same boat and that’s great – you all start fresh in a new city, a new home to start the next progression in your life.  There is no issue with feeling anxious at all but I guarantee if you talk to any Universities about this then they will reassure you that in that first couple of weeks you make some awesome bonds with your fellow students.  A really great website for advice is ‘The Student Room’ if you Click Here then there is some great tips on there, just make sure you ignore the bozo’s that naturally feel the need to comment on forums – we yawn at them! Enjoy Uni, I reckon you’ll be fine!